Booze at Breakfast is a semi-autobiographical novel dedicated to my cool brother, John Ainsworth Scott Jr. He was 43 when he chose suicide, no longer able to find his path nor cope with the deep pain of our wounded father’s brutal abuse. Smart fun guy like many addicts, life of the party, outrageous wit, the last guy you’d pick to off himself. He seemed so sure of himself, so full of promise, of future. Fine wife, great job, two lovely kids, he was on his game.
The pain of the adult child of alcoholism cuts deep into the soul. We struggle with demons we can hardly identify, a sense of emptiness where our self is supposed to be, and shame that rarely shuts up. We don’t know why dad or mom’s drinking is such a big looming hairy troll. But ask any adult child of alcoholism; we all know. We’re resourceful, compassionate, compelling, and we hurt bad inside. Don’t talk, don’t trust, don’t feel, our coping tools.
Johnny had authority issues that played havoc on jobs as administrator in private schools. There was no one to trust growing up. One camp counselor saw what Johnny was dealing with and offered friendship and encouragement. Dad ran him off.
Booze At Breakfast was my attempt to honor Johnny and adult children of addiction for our courage, strength and hope as we gradually peel away the layers of fear and self-loathing. Many ACA’s are finding freedom, sanity and great Love in the FREE (OK, $2 donation) recovery in 12 step meetings. ACA is online as are Al-Anon and AA for meeting times, locations and chat rooms.
Booze At Breakfast is available at Amazon.com.
First half – Stories of physical healing
Second half – Channeled guidance from God on a variety of topics
This is a read for those who’ve gotten a glimpse of God and want to explore further mysteries, to discover your own path to God. There are as many ways as there are people, amazingly.
My friend Steve stood at an overlook bench at our school for spiritual formation, Kairos, near Philadelphia, PA. He pointed for me to sit there. “Let me tell you a story,” he began. Steve is a handsome blond mason, a true mystic, humble and wise and beloved by all.
“I came out of a class about Peter proclaiming his love and devotion to Jesus three times, and Jesus answering, “Feed my sheep.”
I sat here to contemplate that awhile. Next thing, a bird landed on my head! I jerked and it flew off. I glimpsed it as it flew – a tufted titmouse. I thought some, realizing I desperately wanted it to return. I rested my arm on the bench’s back, hoping he’d return and sit on my arm so I could get a look at him.
He landed on my head again. OKay, you’re the boss, just thank you for coming back. He flew again. I begged him silently to return. He did, landed on my head for a minute, then flew away and didn’t return. The magic three.
I listened, enthralled. I had watched Steve hobbling around the garden the day before. He’d stepped on a nail at work. Not one for doctors, he had faith that it would heal itself.
I whispered, “Would you like me to heel your foot?” “Sure,” he said with conviction. I brought his foot to my lap and laid hands on it. Instantly I heard, “He’s mine. I love him.” Done.
I held it a moment longer to be sure God was complete, then put the boot on the ground. We stood to return to school. I stole a glance at his walking. “You’re not hobbling,” I ventured.
“I know.” Just like that.
I thought on that awhile, and realized it was his trust that allowed God to heal him so fast and fully.
“Um, Steve, I don’t get it like you do that God loves me.”
“I know. You will.”
Divine Ordinariness came out of a deep search for God in lots of venues – the 12 steps of Al-Anon, in studying metaphysics. in the Mennonite Church, in psychotherapy and healing practices. Each piece was a building block. Chakra balancing taught me volumes about how energy or spirit is the unseen beginning of everything, as Einstein taught. Acupuncture showed me how energy moves around in the body, removing obstructions and freeing the system so healing can take over
I asked hundreds of people what they knew about God, about healing, and why they sought such strange phenomena. This book is a result of all that research. Outrageous fun, weird, baffling, but oh so real and compelling and potentially powerful.
Divine Ordinariness is available at Smashwords. Buy it here.